J-Bang Reviews Present: War Dogs

"War Dogs" or what I like to call "Diet Wolf of Wallstreet" stars Miles Teller as David Parkouz and Jonah Hill as Efraim Diveroli, two arms dealers hired by the United States government to supply the U. S. army with guns and ammunition. Of course, when a bad deal is made, sh*t spirals out of control and so begins the downfall of the two friends. I watched this movie from start to finish, and honestly, I will say...it wasn't "bad," but it didn't "THRILL" me it either. I'll explain more.

The movie is complimented by strong performances from the small cast, but the one that stood out the most for me is Jonah Hill's Efraim Diveroli. Although, Jonah Hill evidently is the comic relief of the film, Hill also serves as the ambitious hustler that ends up being corrupted most by the money made off the war profiteering. Hill showcases both the light and dark side of his character through his efficient acting, and "War Dogs" is better for it. Miles Teller is cool too...it's just Hill was that much better.

The problem I do have with this movie however is the pacing. The tone is more serious and dramatic than it is comedic, and throughout the runtime, there were moments where I even found myself bored. It wasn't until Bradley Cooper's Henry Girard enters the fray where I found myself intrigue in the story line again, which gets a little better once a clear conflict has been introduced.

"War Dogs" is mostly a character driven story that showcases the rise and fall of two very ambitious arms dealers, but as their journey is showcased to us, the tale ultimately feels shallow rather than inspiring. The story is interesting for those who are into "biopic-like crime dramas" but for me, it's pretty forgettable. In other words, it wasn't bad, it was just...sort of... "okay." "War Dogs" gets a score of 3.2 out of 5.

J-Bang Reviews Presents: Sausage Party (Rated-R Edition)

JESUS F#*KING CHRIST! There is literally NO LINE this movie won't cross! Brought to us by the stoner mind of Seth Rogen, "Sausage Party" tells the tasteful tale of a hot dog finding out the truth about the existence of food. As far as I know, "Sausage Party" is the first Rated R cartoon comedy to come out in theaters since the 90s, and the writers do everything in their power to make sure everyone who watches it knows that this movie is NOT FOR KIDS! Seriously, if you are a parent and think it's a good idea to take your 4 year old kid to see this film, I will officially nominate you for the campaign of 2016's "Bad Parent of the Year" award.

Aside from the hilariously raunchy jokes, AND THERE ARE A SHIT-LOAD, "Sausage Party" does end up delivering the promise of an original story that somehow correlates to a metaphor of religion and the system of belief. No character feels one dimensional, and practically all the main characters have a moment that feels more than deserved. Plus, even though everyone is practically a piece of food, the superb voice acting supplied by a cast head-lined by Seth Rogen, Kristen Wigg, Michael Cera, Edward Norton, and Nick Kroll help somewhat "humanize" this bizarre cast of characters. The best advice I can give for this animated fuck-fest is GO SEE IT for yourself! But I must warn you, like the talking Twinkie says, "Once you see that shit...IT WILL FUCK YOU UP FOR LIFE!" I'm giving one of my favorite movies of the year a J-Bangin score of 4.5 out of 5! "Sausage Party" guaran-freaking-tees a fun time at the movies...if you got the stomach for it that is! 

J-Bang Reviews Present: Suicide Squad

Bruh. If you are planning to go see Suicide Squad, don't even bother man. Starring Will Smith, Margot Robbie, and (supposedly) Jared Leto, Suicide Squad marks the first super-villain led team up comic book movie, and even though it has a couple of highlights, the whole film ends up being a convoluted mess that can't decide what tone it wants to be.

Honesty, if I knew how to describe the plot of the movie to you, I would, BUT the funny thing is...I can't even find the plot of this film. Basically, Amanda Waller, played by Viola Davis, convinces the government to give her permission to create a team full of super-villains, that can perform black ops missions that involve other super-villains. One of my main complaints of this film is that everything...kinda, sort of...just.....happens. The whole story revolves around just ONE mission, and throughout the movie, characters give out clunky dialogue that is nowhere close to being cohesive with the pacing of the film. And out of the six members of the Suicide Squad, only Margot Robbie's Harley Quinn and Will Smith's Deadshot get the most exposure. With Harley and Deadshot taking up the most of screen time, we never really get the chance to care about the other characters. So when the movie is nearly over, and El Diablo and Harley Quinn starts spitting out motivational speeches about friendship, it feels forced and undeserved. Now don't get me wrong, Harley Quinn is one of the best characters to come out of this movie, and all her scenes with Jared Leto's Joker are surprisingly intense and end up being the best scenes of the film, but without screen time being equally shared among other characters, I begin to not give a shit when the other members of Suicide Squad begin to have a "moment." And the moment this movie TRULY shot itself in the foot was when they KILLED OFF the Joker!!!!!

Lol, JK,the Joker doesn't die, but it sure as hell felt like he did. Jared Leto was doing a great job of the Joker, but truly, ended up feeling like a minor distraction for the main characters of the film, instead of an actual adversary. The REAL adversary was just stupid and resulted in what I thought was a very lazy "Transformer-esque" final battle. Quite frankly, I rather this film had more Jared Leto, than more Will Smith, because it was evident and obvious through the editing that half of his scenes were cut out. I wasn't really into Deadshot's story arc throughout the movie and apparently, most of his lines felt forced instead of natural. 

Besides the visual effects and the stellar acting of Jared Leto and Margot Robbie, "Suicide Squad" tells a story worthy of being thrown in the TRASH. It provides plenty of goofy moments (not in a good way) that I'm sure Joel Schumacher would be proud of and ends up feeling light and underwhelming rather than a hefty, compelling action flick. Watching "Suicide Squad" is just as fun as watching a car accident.....and after watching the travesties that were "Man of Steel," and "Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice" (which I initially thought wasn't THAT bad) "Suicide Squad has OFFICIALLY made me done with watching the DC Extended Universe. "Suicide Squad" gets a 2.5 out of 5.